October 29, 2011

Ambien Anyone?

It's been awhile since I've posted about our trip to Paris but consider this fair warning, I still have a lot of pictures to share if I ever get caught up. I dropped a few references to an incident I had at the end of the trip and I promised I would tell all…just took me awhile.

So on our last night in Paris we wandered le Marais looking for a place to eat dinner and stumbled upon the most perfect bistro filled with locals. They were a little off put by our lack of reservations but we were very polite and once we were seated they were very warm and friendly and thankfully spoke excellent English. It was a great last night, pretty uneventful.
 I think this was beef tartar
my dinner ended up being a huge side of beef, wasn't my favorite
Bernie loved his dinner - pork with the house specialty whipped potatoes
I would have killed for those potatoes
Now back to the story…we were pretty much packed before we left for dinner. We had an 11am flight and decided that night we would take the metro to the airport so we used our remaining euros to pay for dinner. Cut to the next morning, again, non eventful. Finished packing, had some baguette and preserves for breakfast in the apartment. Minutes away from leaving for the subway I took my thyroid pills. Nothing unusual with that. Or so I thought. Within minutes I was sleeping sitting up in the dining chair. Bernie woke me up and I tried to walk across the apartment and instead fell to the floor. This went on for a little while, I had NO idea what was happening. I was seeing double, I couldn't walk, did I mention we had to leave for the metro in 5 minutes?

Bernie figured it out pretty quick. It seems I did not take my 3 round white thyroid pills, I took 3 round white Ambien. Three. Ambien. Still don't quite understand how this mix-up happened. To cut a very long story a little bit short, Bernie decided it best to continue with our plan of taking the subway to the airport. ????? Well, we didn't have money for the cab but in hindsight a trip to the ATM would have been the smart idea. Or maybe even a trip to the hospital. But no. I remember me and my suitcase walking down the flight of stairs from the apartment. I think I was maybe moving 1mph at the most with not a care in the world. I remember parts of the walk to the first metro station. Did I mention we needed to connect to a second train? Bernie was walking soooo fast! I remember walking down the long flight of stairs to the metro and some nice man offering to "carry" my suitcase as Bernie ran back up the stairs yelling, "NO NO NO NO!!!!" I still think this man might have been nice, but I was like the drunkest person on earth so my judgement was off. Bernie said two other men followed me onto one of the trains not realizing I was with someone and when Bernie got on they jumped off - now that is scary!

Did I mention I was seeing double? Everything was blurry and I had to close one eye just to see. So here I am walking as slow as it gets with one eye shut tight, an easy target. Next thing I remember we were on another train and as the doors closed I knew we were going the wrong direction. Not sure how I knew but I was right. We have to flash forward to standing at the counter at the airport because I don't remember anything between knowing I was on the wrong train until I was talking to the ticket agent. Now, I don't know if I sounded like a wasted person, but I did all the talking since I handle all our travel and have the status on United. We had totally missed our flights at this point. There was another flight available but it was going to be a $500 change fee. I handed the lady my fancy new no foreign transaction fee credit card and luckily for me it doesn't have any numbers on the front of the card so she didn't know what to do with it and instead said, "that's ok, don't worry about it, we'll waive the fee." We got our tickets, made our way to customs and got right on the plane. I think anyway, I don't recall waiting at all and I only remember customs because another woman was balling her eyes out. Lucky for me that they focused on that lady and not me.

Next thing I remember I was eating lunch on the plane. Even had a glass of wine. Everything was metabolized and it was like nothing ever happened. I was no worse for wear. It didn't cost us any money and we got home just a few hours later than planned. Bernie was frustrated beyond belief but whatever, it was a fluke accident. Prior to that morning I had taken exactly 1 Ambien my entire life and comparing the pills when we got home they looked EXACTLY alike. So there you have it, the crazy end of our trip to Paris. It could have been worse. At least we got a good story out of it and I didn't, you know, die or anything.

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